SEPARATION AND DIVORCE AS A CHRISTIAN IN A UNION, THE HARD DECISION.

My mother persevered with the harshness of marriage. We never got to see our mother break down or fight. A woman is the one to hold her house together. My father never broke down. A man must provide.

These and many more statements like these are what our parents kept on saying as we grew up. Although these were some of their reasons for them being in long term marriages then, the new generation said enough is enough. Women began to fight for equity and empowerment and now women get to decide when enough is really enough when it comes to a union.

With the empowered women, men were left a little behind not knowing how to handle an empowered woman. Recently women have come up confessing to being breadwinners or sole providers in their relationships. This to some, creates a notion of’ ’Untamed/ Un submissive” Wife due to the power and freedom they have in the union

As Africans, Marriage is not just seen as a legal or personal union, but also as a communal and spiritual oneness. In many African societies. Although traditional perspectives on marriage, separation, and divorce may range greatly among ethnic groups, many African communities viewed marriage as a social unit, The shame and stigma of divorce or even the role of elders as mediators and the respect they were given discouraged divorce.

Christians on the other hand argue on the basis that God began the first union that never broke but, to what extent?

The Bible addresses the topics of marriage, separation, and divorce through both the Old and New Testaments. The teachings are often more focused on the sanctity of marriage but also acknowledge situations where divorce may be permitted.

The Bible views marriage as a holy relationship instituted by God. It is generally referred to as a lifelong commitment. Marriage in the Old Testament was supposed to be a link between a man and a woman that parallels the relationship between God and His people (Malachi 2:14-16; Genesis 2:24)

Although it seems tough for separation with Christians, there are circumstances where divorce is permitted like Adultery: In Matthew 19:9, Jesus concedes that divorce is legal in circumstances of adultery (sexual unfaithfulness).

Abandonment: According to 1 Corinthians 7:15, if an unbelieving spouse abandons a believer, the believer is no longer bound by the marriage.

Hardness of Heart: In Matthew 19:8, Jesus mentions Moses’ provision for divorce in circumstances of a “hard heart,” meaning that human depravity and failure to keep marital commitments may result in divorce, albeit this is viewed as a concession rather than an ideal.

No one wants to enter a union to break it. Not all of us would understand what goes on in marriages and so we shy away from judging and keep our opinions. As parents no one wants their child to come home in a casket they rather face the ‘shame’ of a broken union.

Concluding that all these aspects accept divorce in certain conditions, the question we beg to ask is if Christians are allowed to remarry and to how many times?

This article is just to help clear the paradox that we have when it comes to marriage and also to help people especially those in the limelight for, they are judged most. This year, 2024 has seemed to record many couple separations especially the celebrities.

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